Stay positive, stay positive... easy to say, not so easy to do when you are constantly surrounded by the little (and big) ups and downs of life. If it were enough just to want it for things to go well, everyone would know! Don't worry - Dodow is here to show you how it really is possible - and how to fall asleep quickly.
Positive thinking
The key to living in the present is to surround yourself with positive thoughts.
Thinking positively means no more mental beating about that interview you think you'll fail tomorrow. This fear of the future is called performance anxiety. Mild anxiety is part of a normal and useful reaction when facing an immediate challenge... but you must not let your anxiety control you because it could become a problem.
Positive thinking means stopping intrusive thoughts like "I hope he didn't see that piece of lettuce stuck between my teeth oh no he hates me why am I thinking about this help." Focusing on the present is a way to free yourself from your mistakes - it may seem trivial, but on a larger scale, focusing too much on your mistakes can be a cause of depression.
Let's admit it, it's a bit difficult when you chronically suffer from staircase wit. Here are some tips from The Happiness Advantage by Shawn Achor, an American Harvard researcher who "studies happiness."
""Staircase wit" is when you have a brilliant comeback idea but the moment to deliver it has come and gone - leaving you with the terrible feeling of a missed opportunity."
Keep an emotional journal. Warning, we're not telling you to keep a diary like a troubled teenage girl! By putting the positive experiences of the day on paper, you train your brain to stop spontaneously thinking about your negative experiences.
Exercise to fall asleep quickly
Yes, exercise puts you in a good mood! Your body works at full speed to produce endorphins and dopamine to fill you with happiness by the bucketful, so enjoy it every day!
Become zen
Have you ever seen a Buddhist monk lose it behind the wheel? No? Well, that's no coincidence (and not just because they don't use cars in Himalayan temples). Cultivating your zen mind means saying no to emotions that drain and enslave you.
- Do your good deed of the day
Spreading happiness around you is the best way to reap good karma. Think about complimenting those around you whenever you get the chance, helping others without waiting for them to ask, and don't litter anywhere... The more you behave like an empathetic and good-willed human being, the more people around you will reciprocate. "Happiness is born of altruism, and misery of selfishness," says Buddha.
- Get rid of those who drag you down
Are all your friends depressed and dragging you down into the abyss of their misery? Do you feel guilty, want to be a good friend, but are tired of carrying all the world's troubles on your shoulders? If it lasts too long, change your circle!
Just as you are more at risk of being obese if your close ones already are, your mood is influenced by those closest to you. Does that seem a bit harsh? Maybe... but it works both ways! If everyone does their own good deed, soon there will be no need to get rid of anyone.
Sex to fall asleep quickly
To fight depression, try a good book, a hot bath, or even... a little romp in the hay with your partner. In bed, your brain releases oxytocin, also known as the happiness hormone! According to a comparative study between sex and money conducted by economists at the University of Warwick, those who had sex at least once a week were as happy as those who earned 37,000 euros. Having sex also helps you fall asleep because it puts you in ideal conditions.
In addition to tips for falling asleep quickly, neuro-linguistic programming (also known as NLP) is a short therapy that teaches you to manage your emotions and understand those of others.
Created in the 70s by John Grinder, an American linguistics doctor, and his partner Richard Brandler, NLP allows you to revisit unpleasant emotions from painful moments and free yourself from their hold on you.
Here is a small exercise to start:
- Think of a moment that displeased you, whatever the emotion involved. Sadness, anger, shame, fear...
- Project yourself to that moment in your head like in a movie. Be like an observer of your own life rather than an actor.
- Then, change the moment's settings: colors, speed, distance, sound... You should be able to make all the bad emotions that accompany this event disappear.
Soon you will be able to do the same with positive experiences, and improve them to make yourself even happier!
Here is a small exercise to do for a week before going to bed, to help you have a positive mind.
- Take a pen and a notebook.
- Isolate yourself from noise or listen to a soft song.
- Take 3 deep breaths.
- Write down 7 good things that happened to you during the day. Take time to think about details, the people you met, or all the other things you are grateful for.
Examples? I wasn't late for work this morning, I'm happy to have shared a nice lunch with my charming colleague, the weather was nice today...
More than a habit, positive thinking is a way of life!
On the same topic:
Beware, screens keep you from sleeping
Exercise is good for sleep (well, it depends when)
Never say no to a quickie if you're trying to sleep!
